February 24th 2022.
Ira and her husband, Yevhenii, have experienced war twice. They lived in Luhansk Oblast, near Ira’s grandmother. When the Russians invaded in 2014, they remained in their home. However, when Russia launched the full-scale invasion on February 24th, 2022, they knew that, psychologically, they could not live through it again. ‘It was a huge shock when the war started.’
They were evacuated by volunteers and were able to escape with their two sons – a six-year-old and a baby. Ira told us that it was ‘really scary’ when the Russians shot at the evacuation buses as they were trying to leave. Their young son carried a rucksack clearly labelled with his name, an address, a telephone number and his blood group in case they were separated. They had no idea where they would be going. ‘One day you have a home, the next you have nothing,’ Ira said. When they left, there was no light and no water in their home. Now, they understand that their neighbours have stripped their home bare – everything they owned has been taken.
Yevhenni made the brave decision to volunteer for the military and was sent to the front lines. Ira and her son arrived in Lviv with Ira’s 85-year-old grandma. Once in Lviv, Ira and her children could have left the country but chose to stay in Ukraine. They all lived in one room in a hostel in Uzhhorod, a ‘safe’ area for 18 months. Grandma found it very difficult to adapt. She had lived in her home for 85 years and was very attached to it. She could not understand why she had to leave and could not adapt to the different climate in Western Ukraine. She gradually developed dementia and Ira had to find a private nursing home for her where she was well cared for, but she sadly died.
Although hostel life was difficult, sharing a kitchen, toilet and bathroom with many other families, Ira was glad to be able to sleep peacefully and to live somewhere where there was water and light and no soldiers. Meanwhile, Yevhenii was discharged from the army on medical grounds. He is still struggling from his experiences.
Eventually, the family were able to find a cheap flat to rent in Uzhhorod. Ira and Yevhenni now have three children, and they live in two rooms plus a bathroom and toilet. There are limited cooking facilities, but they have a supportive landlord and friendly neighbours who try to help. Rents are expensive in Uzhhorod and have increased since the war started – there are many families still living in the hostel because they cannot afford to leave. This flat is cheaper because of the dilapidated condition of the building. As we visited, Yevhenii was filling the gaps and preparing the flat for winter.
Ira learnt about ‘Equilibrium’ and enrolled her six-year-old who was suffering psychological problems. Since participating in the project: ‘He has become much calmer and less hyperactive.’ It helps that other children in the family are also able to attend: ‘It is a project for families.‘ Ira enjoyed getting to know other mothers and praised Equilibrium: ‘Their toys, resources and activities are great.’ ‘I have met wonderful people who help and care about us.’
Ira is just 26 years old. Already she has experienced more than most people experience in their lifetimes. She concluded:
‘I am pleased, because even though it has been extremely hard, the experiences I have been through have helped me. I have learnt that I am resilient and can come through difficult times.’
Ira has now enrolled to study at university. She has a sense of a future and of hope. She eventually would like to run her own business and she wants to be a good role-model for her children: ‘They will see me studying.’ She believes her prayers were answered when her husband received a medical discharge and was able to return home. ‘God gives me strength.’ Yevhenii has new purpose. He is able to enjoy family life, to be a great ‘hands-on’ dad to his children and he is also a volunteer with Equilibrium – helping others who have experienced the horrors of war – all this is contributing to his own recovery from trauma.
A huge thank you to Ira and Yevhenii for sharing their story with us. We were privileged to be invited into their home and to deliver a DHM food parcel in person.
All our partners, like Margarita, are running summer camps for children and will shortly start preparing Christmas activities. If you would like to support children who have been traumatised by war, please donate either through Stewardship or through a standing order or one-off payment to the DHM account:
Sort Code: 30-90-91 / Account Number: 68149860
Account Name: Dnipro Hope Mission
Bank Name: Lloyds Bank
This blog was written by Melanie Gray, DHM trustee who was in Ukraine visiting Margarita and the Equilibrium Project from July 26th – August 5th 2024.
